Sunday, July 17, 2016

An open letter to FAIRWAY management regarding your tasteless, puerile, "Juicy Melons" advert

Dear Fairway Management,

Clearly you have issues with managing your company. After all, you recently had to go through Chapter 11 bankruptcy reorganization, which signals to me that you don't always make the smartest choices.

But for a company trying to emerge from Chapter 11 to send out a sexist advertisement to WOMEN? What the heck are you thinking? I'm not going to post the advert here, because I don't want to give you the viral publicity you were apparently craving. Instead, I'm going to tell you this:

1) I unsubscribed from your email list.
2) I'm informing you that I'm not shopping at any of your stores until you issue an apology to me, my daughter, and to every woman who had to be subjected to that ridiculousness in the year 2016.

But here's the most important part. I'm letting you know just how much money I've spent with your company since you opened in Stamford in October 2010, so you know how much this ridiculous mishegas is costing you:

2010 $1474.44 Store opened in October
2011 $3495.41
2012 $4890.49
2013 $4849.39 includes $559.61 from Fairway Catering for Dad’s shiva
2014 $3965.85
2015 $3799.12 includes $287.15 from Fairway Catering for Mom's shiva
2016 $2088.93

Total $24,563.61

You see, Senior Fairway Management, I know all this because despite having a pair of "juicy melons" attached to my body, I have an MBA in Finance, I own my own house, invest in a financial portfolio, decide what car I'm going to buy, and make many other decisions about my life. I've achieved the success I have in my life while fighting exactly the kind of stupidity, sexism, and discrimination that ridiculous, puerile ad represents on Wall St, in publishing, in agriculture, in journalism, dealing with auto mechanics, dealing with plumbers, dealing with banks, and I never in a million years thought that by the time my daughter would be a few years from entering the workforce, she would STILL being facing this kind of crap.

So I've learned to put my money where my mouth is. When my investment broker disagreed with an instruction I gave him and told me "Ask your father" (even though my father had Alzheimer's at the time and, let me reiterate, I have an MBA in Finance and had worked as a financial analyst) I moved my investments to another firm. And that is what I am doing now.

Firms like yours need to learn that SEXISM DOESN'T PAY. It costs you money.

I hope for your sake all the bros and sexist idiots that liked that ad make up for the dollars you will lose from pissed-off intelligent, fed-up women like myself.

UPDATE: I decided to update with an image of the ad that was retweeted by Fairway Corporate Twitter referencing that women were upset with this ad and making light of it, with a totally disgusting hashtag:

For all of you at home who might not be aware of the more sordid meaning of the reference, allow me to make your stomach turn:

Again I ask: What sentient being in 2016 would think this is a good marketing strategy - particularly for a SUPERMARKET?


  1. Excellent letter. Let us know if they respond.

    1. I will. BTW, I posted on Twitter the "core values" from website of Sterling Investment partners, the private investment company that now owns Fairway. One is to:"Build trust based relationships by being professional, respectful and honest in all of our interactions." Apparently that wish to be "professional, respectful and honest" doesn't extend to those of us with XX chromosomes. : /

  2. Also, I am so sick of being told to "relax" by asshole men who are part of the sexist culture. So I'm going to "relax" all the way over to another supermarket.

  3. Oh, also checked out leadership of Sterling Investment Partners. Well unlace my corset and bring me my hartshorn...THEY ARE ALL MEN! My bosom heaves with the SHOCK!

  4. Brilliant letter, Sarah! When things like this hit, I think, "How many people had to approve this? The art director? The account manager? The marketing manager? The advertising department? Top brass?" Like, HOW MANY opportunities where there for someone to go, Um, maybe we shouldn't piss off our PRIMARY AUDIENCE. Then I wonder if someone HAD expressed doubt about the wisdom of this choice and then faced being laughed out of the room for being a "pussy." Arrrghhhh...

    1. Exactly. I wonder the same thing. I mean, are their biggest customers hedge fund guys and brogrammers? Who knows, maybe they spend a fortune in catering for lunches, so they don't care about losing my measly $4-5 grand a year. But if they lose a lot of women like me, well, that adds up. So you have to wonder. Several other women on my Facebook said they already complained and others said they aren't going to shop there anymore because of this. So I wonder what the cost/benefit analysis is to Sterling Investment Partners from this boneheaded move.

  5. i do support you completely and will no longer be spending any money at Fairway - not because of your rant, but because i saw the ad before...this is not so different than what some owner of Barilla pasta did to gay couples ... i am not a woman, i am not gay...i do not support this kind of behavior